Return of the Runebound Professor

Chapter 624: Show

“You know, I swear I’ve had this conversation already. I think I’m getting déjà vu,” Noah said, pursing his lips. He glanced at Moxie. “I have, haven’t I?”

“I think you’re going to be having it a lot,” Moxie said dryly. “People tend to be surprised when someone comes back from the dead.”

“They really shouldn’t,” Noah said.

After all, I do it all the time.

Ulya stared at him, slack jawed, barely maintaining her grip on the second bottle of wine in her hands. Her puppet was doing a remarkable job of balancing both her picnic basket and the other bottle she’d lost.

Well, it looks like she’s definitely made those upgrades. Glad she was able to get back on her feet after her other puppets got screwed up in the fight between Silvertide and Wizen. Out of all the teachers in the Advanced Track, she was one of the few that’s generally on our side.

“I don’t understand,” Ulya said. “You were pulled into the Damned Plains by Wizen. I heard the reports. Silvertide himself confirmed it. How are you here?”

Silvertide cleared his throat. “It seems that my findings were partially incorrect. He did fall into the Damned Plains, but it seems Vermil did not die.”

Ulya froze. She stared at Silvertide, not having seen him in the mass of people in the room, then pressed a hand to her forehead. “Silvertide? What is happening? None of this makes any sense. How could Vermil be alive?”

“Come on, Ulya. You’re intelligent enough to know the answer to this question. Two people enter, one person leaves. What do you reckon happened?”

“You’re implying that you beat Wizen? The mage that was strong enough to take on the entirety of Arbitage’s Enforcers and emerge victorious? And you defeated him — in the Damned Plains, no less?”

If we’re being really technical about things, then yes. Wizen definitely wasn’t planning on leaving the afterlife alive, but I did convince him to end it earlier to save Sticky instead of looking for his daughter. I don’t know if I’d normally want to go around bragging about having convinced someone to kill themselves. That’s just bad taste. Moxie might be right, I do have a problem.

“I’m alive. He isn’t.”

“He speaks the truth,” Aylin said.

Ulya glanced to him.

The second bottle of wine slipped from her hands. This time, her puppet didn’t have any way to catch it. It shattered against the ground as Ulya’s eyes went as wide as saucers. She took a step back.

Moxie flicked a hand. A vine erupted out from within a sleeve and sliced through the air, binding around Ulya’s mouth, cutting off the other woman’s scream an instant before it could even start.

“Let’s not bring the entirety of the T building down on our heads, shall we?” Moxie asked. “Seriously. You’re a Rank 4 mage. Carry yourself like one.”

Ulya clawed at the vine with one hand and thrust a panicked finger in the direction of the demons with the other, as if Moxie had somehow managed to miss the fact that half the room was sporting horns.

“Yes,” Moxie said patiently. “Demons. I know. They’re friendly.”

“Honestly,” Emily said, shaking her head. “You were staring at Vermil for like five seconds. If it takes you that long to notice a horde of demons standing right next to him, then they would have already killed you if they were planning on it. Do better.”

Somehow, getting scolded by Emily seemed considerably more effective than Moxie’s assurances. Ulya’s eyes narrowed and she pulled at Moxie’s vine again. It unwound from her mouth, letting her speak again.

“Is this meant to be some kind of joke? A setup?” Ulya asked.

Moxie’s vine slowly snaked around Ulya’s back. The professor barely even reacted as it pulled her inside the room. Her puppet followed obediently after her, not even reacting as the vine released Ulya and reached over to the door to close it. The vine then twisted the lock to ensure they wouldn’t get any more surprise visitors.

“I’m not nearly this funny,” Noah said. “I’m afraid it’s all real.”

“You escaped the Damned Plains.”

“Yes.”

“With a horde of demons.”

“Also correct.”

“And they’re… tame?”

“They aren’t wild animals,” Noah said. “And they also aren’t deaf.”

“She tastes scared,” Aylin said. “I would not take any offense to what she says right now. Her mind is in a state of panic. I suspect she may start crying.”

“I most certainly will not,” Ulya snapped, glaring at Aylin. “I am a researcher in the Advanced Track at Arbitage. I am not some shivering schoolgirl.”

“Boo,” Lee said.

Everyone stared at her.

“What?” Lee asked. “I wanted to see if she would cry.”

“You — wait.” Ulya squinted at Lee. Then she cursed under her breath. “I know you. You didn’t have horns before. You’re a demon?”

“Yup. Does this mean you aren’t going to cry?”

“I am not going to cry!”

“Can I have your snacks, then? Your puppet isn’t eating them.”

“You cannot,” Ulya snapped.

Her earlier fear had partially evaporated, largely due to the sheer incredulity that had sprung up at Lee’s questions. Noah couldn’t help but wonder if that had been completely intentional. It was difficult to tell what Lee was thinking, but she was far more perceptive than most people gave her credit for.

“You did show up at a good time, though,” Noah said, trying to steer the conversation back in a constructive direction. “See, I need to pay a visit to the Advanced Track. There have been some people in it involved in some things I’m not all too happy with. You see, I take it quite poorly when someone endangers my students.”

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Ulya’s eyes focused on Noah — and realization bubbled to life within them.

“When did you get back?” Ulya asked.

“Recently.”

“Jakob and Verrud. They vanished during the exam and the Enforcers are still trying to figure out what happened.”

“We didn’t see anything,” Todd put in.

“Nor did I,” Yulin said, raising her voice and squeezing through the crowd of demons so Ulya could see her. “It must have been a freak accident.”

“I — oh, fuck off. How many people do you have packed into this room? Yulin is with you now? Did you steal Jakob’s student?”

“I did nothing of the sort,” Noah replied. “She simply requested to join my class and I obliged.”

“You killed Jakob and Verrud,” Ulya said flatly. “Marley too.”

“I believe I made it very clear that I would tolerate no threats to my students. Don’t tell me you’re bothered about this. Two professors collaborated to murder innocent students. Are you really implying that’s entirely fine with you?”

“Of course it isn’t,” Ulya said. “I don’t care about them. I’m more concerned with how you — a Rank 3 according to Arbitage — has killed Jakob, Verrud, and apparently, Wizen!”

“The power of friendship?” Noah offered.

Ulya stared at him.

“Arbitage’s records are outdated,” Moxie said, shooting Noah a glare that said not to mess with Ulya too much. “Vermil is not a rank 3. He’s a Rank 5.”

“Which I’ll be reporting very shortly. I’m certain the Office will be timely with my update in status,” Noah said. “But I can’t be held responsible for their incompetence. Look, Ulya. I know this is a lot to take in — but I trust our old deal should be more than sufficient to grease the gears.”

“What are you talking about?”

Noah removed the massive grimoire from his back and thunked the book down on the ground before him. He flipped it open.

She still needs Runes, and I need backup. As much as I’d love to take out every single noble gunning for Isabel’s Soul Master Rune on my own, there are just too many of them. The more people on my side, the better.

A few strong runes for her puppets ought to change her mind real fast.

“This,” Noah said.

Ulya stared at him. She looked a little more confused than impressed, though here might have been a small flicker of interest somewhere within her expression.

That certainly wasn’t the response I was expecting.

“What?” Noah asked.

“That is a picture of a fat man wearing skimpy clothes,” Aylin kindly informed Noah.

He looked down at the pages of the grimoire.

Aylin had not been lying. There was a rather impressive sketch of a well fed man who seemed to have found his way into a set of clothes that fit him, if only barely.

At least he isn’t naked.

“You twisted little shit,” Noah snapped. “Show her the runes or I’m not feeding you for a week.”

The Grimoire’s pages rippled. Ulya’s eyes went wide.

“What is this?”

“Runes,” Noah replied, checking the pages once more before speaking. “I’ve got a number of them. I’ll warn you that Demon Runes tend to be… flawed, but I’d imagine they’d serve quite well if used for fuel in making puppets.”

“I’ve never seen anything like this,” Ulya breathed. “I can’t read them at all. Can you?”

Noah waggled a hand in the air. “Not really, but the demons can.”

“And you’re willing to sell these?”

“I’m willing to give them to you,” Noah replied. “Gold is nice, but it isn’t what I’m looking for right now. What I need is loyalty.”

Ulya’s head tilted to the side and she pulled her gaze away from the runes to meet Noah’s eyes. “That’s the kind of line that someone preparing for some real shit gives. What are you planning?”

“I’m afraid that isn’t how the deal works. You’re going to have to decide if the risk is worth it before you throw your lot in.”

“That’s not a very favorable deal to me.”

“There are a select few people in this plane who have access to Demon Runes,” Noah said. He gestured to the demons around them. “And even fewer who have direct access to demons that will help them understand what it is they’re working with. No offer is without drawbacks. You can decide if it’s worth it or not.”

Ulya glanced at the hooded puppet standing behind her. Her hands tightened at her sides before she let out a curt breath and gave him a sharp nod. “I joined the Advanced Track to get research opportunities. I wasn’t expecting to play all the politics I got wrapped up in. That’s on me — but this is a lot more than anything the Advanced Track can offer. If you can get me opportunities like this, then consider me swayed. I’m in.”

“Joining Spider’s encourage is the wisest decision you can make,” Aylin said. “You have chosen the path of inevitable victory.”

“Spider? Wait. Wasn’t that your mentor?” Ulya asked with a frown. “Are you saying that…”

“I have a bit of a lying problem. I may have a few more names than you thought.”

Ulya stared at him. “I — what? But… how?”

Noah just gave her a grin.

“Better keep that name under wraps for the time being,” he said to Aylin. “Don’t need the wrong people getting wind of it too early. It’ll make it harder to bait out the people I need to kill.”

“Understood,” Aylin said.

“The people you need to kill?” Ulya repeated. “Are you going after Verrud and Jakob’s superiors?”

“Among everyone else that is trying to take what doesn’t belong to them. I’d start thinking on what kind of runes you want for your puppet,” Noah advised. “Because you’re going to need them soon. I’ll be using all the resources at my disposal.”

“Hold on,” Ulya said. “When you say everyone else… nobles are greedy. You can’t mean—”

“Ulya,” Noah said softly, closing the grimoire and holding her gaze with his own. “I will rip this kingdom apart at the seams if they think they can come after my students.”

The front of the grimoire writhed. Its eye snapped open, swiveling around the room. Contessa let out something between a disgusted gagging noise and a whimper as its attention passed over her before landing on Ulya.

Its excited. Not sure if that’s a good thing or not, but I’m beyond the point of caring. I’ll feed it to its hearts content as long as it stays on my side and doesn’t eat anything too important.

Ulya’s features paled.

“Doesn’t that sound fun?” Jalen asked, rubbing his hands together. “I haven’t seen the kingdom in proper chaos in hundreds of years. I might go on a bender.”

“You’re all insane,” Ulya said.

“My mental faculties are entirely intact,” Aylin said.

“As are mine,” Yoru said softly. “More than they ever have been.”

“Unlike your arms,” Lee said.

“Don’t be mean, Lee,” Violet said.

“It’s okay. She’ll have new ones soon enough,” Lee said cheerfully. “It’s important to look on the bright side of life.”

“I will?” Yoru asked.

Lee nodded empathetically. “Of course you will. We can steal somebody’s and stick them on if you can’t find any of your own.”

“I don’t think that’s how it works,” Todd said.

“Have you ever tried it before?”

“No.”

“Then how do you know?” Lee arched an eyebrow as if she’d just found a massive logical hole in his argument. “You don’t know until you try.”

Ulya ran a hand through her hair. She reached out to the glass of wine her puppet held, popped the cork off with a thumb, and took a long swig straight from the bottle.

“What did I just sign up for?” Ulya asked.

“A fun time,” Jalen said.

“An opportunity to get stronger,” Moxie offered.

“Treason against the noble families,” Karina said.

“War,” Noah said. “And I’m afraid I’ll be needing your services immediately. I need you to help prepare things for me tonight.”

“How so?” Ulya asked with trepidation.

“I want you to spread word that a demon by the name of Spider will be making an appearance at the Advanced Track meeting tonight along with me.”

“Aren’t you Spider?”

Noah smiled. “Fortunately, we have someone here who’s quite adept at shifting their form. Isn’t that right, Karina?”

Karina’s face paled.

“Would you believe me if I said I can’t do that anymore?”

“No.”

“Shit,” Karina said.

Jalen’s grin stretched until it covered his entire face and he let out a cackle of laughter. “This is going to be a shitshow. I can’t wait.”